Just one more month, and 2015 is finally over.
A Friend text me quite randomly asking me if I have achieve what I should be doing for the year 2015. I couldn’t answer him straight into his face, and lied a simple “yes, but could be better”. I couldn’t tell him how bad the year unfold and unravel itself. I simply can’t.
I was so embarrassed.
A lot that I thought I got it all in the bag, are actually thrown, sprawl all over the place.
Got to keep myself walking, forward and slowly picking those things up again.
Clearing out all my old photos from my MacBook, and one by one all these old memories rushed back.
Piercing and slicing through that broken heart.
Sitting alone in my room, controlling those unfinished tears.
Looking at those 3 years of memories of not just us, but the life around it.
Just broke my heart all over again.
That final photo of seeing my engagement ring and my wedding ring tears everything apart.
Those haunting ghostly empty promises you eventually did not keep.
Those horrid one year that you allow your family to unleash upon me.
It haunts me like an ever ending ghost story.
To those who have been with me all the way through. Thank you. Especially to those whom I have neglected, but still close to my heart. Dance and hardship brought us together, work and life brought us apart. But we still have that long withstanding bond that I appreciate til the end of time.
When all things fail, they remind me that dance will never fail me. And that I should return to my roots and here I am. Back and starting over.
Those random cheery messages from my dearest 大姐们, make me realised that I still have people to lean on. Thank you for taking care of this ever emotional and unstable Xiao Xiao.