I cannot believe it.
I thought I was very strong! And I thought I was moving on nicely, started off choppy, but nonetheless, progressing, pushing and crawling into my “new” life.
But I was wrong. After my 23rd birthday, I sank into a new low. With a lot of realisation, and mainly how stupid I am. How I have always force myself in denial. Forcing myself to think that I was fine.
After 9mnths, of crazy nights, random hook-ups, and possible candidates. I back on numerous breakdown. And thinking, wondering and most importantly, I was still hoping. Like a motherfucking ass!!
I am still hoping! WTF ):
I thought I had you, to forget him. But we didn’t work. We’re not what we once used to be. We wandered into a situation that both of us didn’t want to be in, and alas, I’ve come terms that enough is enough. Our lives shouldn’t interwined at all. But it did, and now I’m trying unwind it. It’ll be hard, but I’m trying real hard.
Now, I’m back to square one. I’m trying to climb back, to that sweet sweet girl. I’m tired of everything I did for the past 9mnths, and I’m tired of playing around. Hoping and wanting. I’m tired..
“Love, come back to me to what we once were”, cause you helped me forget him.