Behind every smile.

On every CNY, grandma always asked us to pray to the gods an asked for something deep within our hearts. As I pray to my gods in heaven, I asked for happiness and health, just like what I do every single year.

I asked that my family will always be safe and always close to my heart. And that whatever they want, somehow they will receive it one way or another. I prayed and asked for my personal happiness and that one day I will not stare at my own room thinking that something is truly missing.

I am not sure if I will ever gain that personal happiness. That personal happiness, not what I receive from the world but what I receive from my heart, and that I hope to find it one day. And of course hopefully not too late too, as well.

All I need is to focus, change my lifestyle and push on. I am growing older and in life is not about just about the electric colours, sometimes the blacks and whites are the most beautiful.

CNY day 2 should have been beautiful, mundane and utterly peaceful. Why do you have to ruin the whole day for me. Why?


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Just another girl

Always thinking, always wondering. living everyday. She is standing strong for herself, looking forward and always try to be positive. Now, tell her something that she don't already know.

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